The 10 Worst Films of 2017

Worst of 2017

The only reason these films are not on the list is that I was spared seeing them…

I am still waiting on a few movies to see before I can list my top ten movies of 2017, but I am more than ready to list the pieces of trash (trash being the most polite word I can think of) of the past year. Movies in the collage above are not going to be mentioned, only because I did not see them.

 

That being said, here comes the reminder of the pains I went through the past year…

 

10.

The Shack

Despite having a nice message, The Shack falls in so many ways that it sadly becomes another forgettable Christian movie. Also, I still don’t see how you can see the title and not think it is a horror film.

 

9.

The Space Between Us

I had hopes for The Space Between us, but was disappointed. Despite nice acting and chemistry between the young leads, the story goes nowhere and we are left wishing Butterfield and Robertson were in another movie.

 

 

8.

The Emoji Movie

 

Every now and then, I feel a little sorry for The Emoji Movie, which was not as hated by me as most of the rest of the human race (even by those who did not see it). Then my mind remembers how bland and boring the film was. And the absolute worst humor imaginable.

 

7.

Split

 

Lousy M. Night, making me almost hopeful that he may be going back to good movie making. At the end, Split is still an utter failure, with premises that I found completely ridiculous.

 

6.

Roland (Idris Elba) in Columbia Pictures' THE DARK TOWER.

 

While watching The Dark Tower, you get a sense that this movie had so much promise, but that every decision made behind camera was the wrong one. I never read the book series (by Stephen King), but I feel that doing so will give me more reason to hate the film.

 

5.

Transformers

Tranformers: The Last Knight. It is a Transformers movie. That alone should be enough explanation.

 

4.

POTCDMTNT

Remember when the Pirates of the Caribbean movies where fresh, new, and exciting? Well, if they make more sequels like Dead Men Tell No Tales, I will forget why I liked the first film at all to begin with.

 

3.Life

 

A solid cast and some neat special effects cannot stop Life from being a rip off of the original Alien, or from having one of the worst end twists I have seen in my life.

 

2.

The Snowman

If you look up all the people associated with The Snowman, you will be as confused as I am. Confused not just at the plot, but at how all these people could make a film the equivalent of eating yellow snow.

 

1.

frozenolaf

 

It may have been a Disney animated “short” (yeah, those quotation marks are as important as ever), but I have seldom felt more anger (even hatred) towards a movie screen than when I had to sit through Olaf’s Frozen Adventure. Sure, Disney pulled the film (which was followed by the far more superior Coco) a few weeks later, but those of us who saw it were left with one of the most excruciating experiences that we are still not sure is over yet. No one asked for this film to be in a theater, and I predict it will have the same future that was given to The Star Wars Christmas Special back in the 1970s.

Olaf’s Frozen Adventure (2017)

Olafs frozen adventure

Olaf’s 21 minute quest to find a holiday tradition.

It was around the second preview before Coco that I got up to use the rest room. On my way back to the theater, I noticed a sign I must have missed the second time around. The sign read that Coco would start later than normal, because the animated short, Olaf’s Frozen Adventure, was nearly 21 minutes long.

I had not really cared much to see the short in the first place (I did vastly enjoy the original Frozen, but I like it so much more when the short films before a Disney/Pixar film are original pieces). Earlier in the day, a friend’s daughter said she would see Coco only because she wanted to see Olaf. To her, I say the following: this is one move from Disney I cannot support. I have seldom been more angry at the company.

It was very tempting of me to give this short film (which is far from short) my first zero rating, but I must admit I did smile at a few moments (the only one I do remember liking a bit is about fruitcake). The premise is simple: It is Christmas time in Arendel and the sisters Ana (Kristen Bell) and Elsa (Idina Menzel) set up for a big dinner, they realize no one will come since everyone has their own Christmas traditions. This is when Olaf (Josh Gad) decides to find a tradition for his friends to have together.

The movie is harmless, but with a runtime of just over 20 minutes (including four songs (which are forgettable), Olaf’s Frozen Adventure is the best example of superfluous I can think of. I sat there, wondering why not just use this as a TV special? Sure enough, when I got home, I found out the film was supposed to be a TV special, but the execs and makers found the material “too theatrical”.

Uh huh.

If a movie theater (and, according to reports, the one I was at was not the only one) is letting you know that the main feature is going to start later than normal due to the “short” before hand, you made a grave mistake (it also does not help that it is not shown for critics).

It is bad enough that I had to be reminded that this was not the first short from the Frozen universe (Frozen Fever was played before 2015’s live action Cinderella). Olaf’s Frozen Adventure will be remembered for every wrong reason imaginable. I would not be surprised if they don’t even include it on the home release of Coco (which, unlike Olaf, is far more worth your money).

Still not convinced? Even the kid next to me was saying how glad he was the thing finally ended.

 

Overall: Half a Star 1/2 *